It's a HOME, It's a TOUGH DECISION!

With our house sold and a cut-off date of June 3rd to get enrolled in the neighborhood schools in Tega Cay, we are frantically trying to figure out where we are going to live. Our closing is in 3 weeks and it would be nice to move from one house to the other instead of renting out a storage unit and essentially making 2 moves when we could just make one. At the same time, sometimes these things cannot be rushed. The house that we feel we must move in to to make our dreams of adoption come true needs, well, some work...some TLC! It's so hard to be patient, but it looks like taking our time, hiring a contractor, a structural engineer, and an inspector, are going to pay-off in the long run. Hopefully all signs will be "go" and we can get moved-in before the school year comes to a close. We are still in a full-out battle with bio-mom over where the big kids should attend school, but with no one living in Indian Land, we will have no other choice but to
(aw shucks) enroll Carly and Conner in THE BEST schools in the state (another reason we love Tega Cay).
The choice is between a lovely, wooded, 4 bedroom, 2300 square foot home with a boat slip that needs NO WORK listed at $250,000, and a not-so-good-looking, also wooded, 6 bedroom, 3200 square foot home that needs A LOT of work listed at $215,000. Decisions decisions....
I know this: that God is leading us and that He will help us to decide. Even though I so badly want to move in to the smaller, beautiful, more-expensive, EASIER, house....I think that what I want might not matter....
Below is what we are working with here:


I'm sure you can guess which is which! We need prayers that we are led to make the right choice...it's a big one! xoxo

Last minute getaway....

So, last week, before the festivities of Easter weekend, I made a last minute decision to get away to the beach. It was just me and the babies. The big kids were at their mom's house and Trey was behind at work, so the timing was perfect. It was a test of nerves driving down to Ocean Isle with a 2 year old and a 5 month old....the dvd player was a lifesaver. When we finally arrived to the Ardrey beach house, it was as if I hadn't just listened to the in-van craziness for the past 3.5 hours. What a sweet little place. The house was one the far East end of the island. There was a pretty view from the kitchen and front porch. We found the upstairs bedroom and loft to be the perfect place for me and the babies to settle in. First order of business for Joey...get to the beach. After unpacking a few things I threw together a beach bag and we headed down to the water. The effects of being cooped up in a mini-van all morning were definitely showing as Joey ran around and chased after me as I pushed Ailey in her stroller. That afternoon the wind was fierce and the temperature was just right. We headed in for baths and dinner and then played on the porch as the sun set. We stayed for another day and a half. It was such sweet time with my babies. Of course, doing everything alone was exhausting, but it was worth it. Joey had so much fun playing on the beach. He loved collecting shells and making sandcastles. Little Ailey saw the ocean for the first time and felt the sand between her toes.

There were many photo opportunities....beautiful babies + beautiful scenery = MAMMARAZI! haha. I think that my kids think that having a camera in their faces is a normal part of life.
On our last day there we tracked down my spring breaking sister and spent some time with her. She had her "big boy" friends with her and Joey really enjoyed getting their attention. They were great with Joey and they all had a blast getting in touch with their inner child while digging giant holes and burying one another.
Getting away was just so good for me. Being at the beach is so calming and refreshing. It was good for Trey, too. He was able to get so much of his end-of-month work done that he got his monthly bonus! I told him I wouldn't have a problem going out of town at the end of every month...wink wink. Breaking free from routine, every once in a while, is GOOD! GOOD! GOOD!

Its not "just a toy"....

Dear parents,
Today Conner came home with yet another new "toy" from his Mother's house. After getting in trouble for not listening, we comfiscated his shiny, new, expensive I'm guessing, Nintendo DsI. After Conner went to bed Trey and I decided to investigate this new gadget. We found it had unrestricted, wireless, internet access. We also found we were able to browse hundreds of pornographic websites and images. We set every single parental block possible and still haven't decided if he is getting the stupid thing back. As parents in this day and age we should never, as Conner's Mother did, assume that a toy is just a toy. The filth we were able to access on that thing was detrimental to our child's innocence and safety. It makes me sick to think of how many children out there have parent's as clueless as bio-mom. Do I think my 7 year old would ever seek those types of websites out? No. BUT, here's the kicker, all we did was google search the word "sex".....

more important things

I have this sister-in-law and she's incredibly passionate about things that really matter in this life. Recently I casually asked how things were going with their adoption of an Ethiopian baby. She started filling me in. She kept talking and stupid me kept asking and asking and asking. Finally she referenced some blogs about families who adopted and said I could learn a lot more from them. She volunteered to e-mail me the links. "No! I'm too afraid to look any further in to it!" We have four children already, you see. I was supposed to feel "done" after the birth of our last daughter, but that wasnt/isn't working for me. I had just gotten dear hubby to agree to a 5th bundle of joy, he would NEVER go for adopting on top of that! No, looking further into the world of adoption would not do me any good.

A few days passed since mine and super sister-in-laws conversation. Feeling a little brave and overwhelmed with curiosity, I YouTube searched, "Ethiopian Gotcha Day". These are videos of parents journeying to Ethiopia to bring their precious, no longer orphaned, children HOME. I couldn't stop watching. I made hubby watch a number of particularly sweet ones....which made him turn to me with my eyes full of tears and say, "you arent getting any serious ideas, are you?". I lied and told him I was just curious.

This led to me texting my SIL....."Hey, will you go ahead and e-mail me those links?" This made her laugh.....she knows me well and was probably expecting this. So she mailed them. So I read them. I laughed, I cried, and I felt something deep within me saying that adopting would be a part of my life....my family's life.

Well, this could never happen! I told my stupid big heart to cut it out and get over this unreasonable idea. The more and more I prayed to God to take this new desire away, the stronger it grew. What an annoying concept. I found myself on my knees, my heart breaking for the orphans of Ethiopia. I had done my research. I could not pretend I didnt know what was going on over there. I was led to Proverbs 24:11....

Rescue the perishing,
do not hesitate to step in and help.
If you say "that is none of my business" will that get you off the hook?
Someone is watching you closely, you know-
Someone not impressed with weak excuses.

Okay! I hear you!

BUT remember? My sweet husband, Trey? The one who dreams of retirement and getting the kids out of the house?

I prayed that God would give me the right words at just the right time to impact Trey the same way I was being impacted...and He did! As I told my husband what I felt called to do, he listened and did not judge. His heart was open and he saw what my heart looked like as I told him I knew how crazy it sounded....but that despite the craziness, I knew our family could do it....could bless and be blessed through adoption. Then....he agreed:)

House selling, hunting, and a little more waiting than anything else...

I really need to let my realtor know I no longer want to be notified via email by central showing. I get far more emails each day than I do phone calls which means that each time the email notification goes off my heart skips a beat. Why? Because hearing from central showing, so far, has meant that I have exactly 1 hour and 45 minutes tops to prepare my home to be sold. The moments following the alert go something like this:
Call central showing to confirm in the MOST FAKE VOICE that, "sure, we'd LOVE to show the house today and we are ready!"...lies! Hang-up and get Joey occupied with the simplest, least messy, activity possible. Movie or today, I let him ride his tricycle in the garage with the garage door down! Pray that Ailey will nap or not scream like crazy as I start by making the bed and then go into the kitchen to empty the trash, notice the dishes in the sink, do the dishes, get back to the trash, go to empty the trash in the bathroom, end up bleaching the tub, go back for trash can, notice the mirror, go to get windex from the kitchen, notice the stove top needs cleaning, clean the stove top, get the windex, windex the mirror, finally take that trash from the bathroom outside, open the van doors, leave front door open, start throwing laundry in the van, throw things in a bag to leave the house, go to get the vaccum, notice dusty televisions, dust televisions, finally vaccum and so on and so on until both of my children are screaming of neglect and I am panting and searching frantically through the diaper bag I just crammed full of "leaving the house essentials" for my inhaler. WHEW! This will be the death of me. When we are moving all these things down to our home in Tega Cay it will all be worth it.
Here's the real kicker about this morning's "showing episode"....no one showed.

The "What's New With Everyone Update"

Well, let's start with Trey.
Trey is busy busy busy with work. He comes home and his brain is so full of WORK that he can't do simple things like make coffee, change diapers, put a new roll of toilet paper on the roll....it's really bad. "I'm fuzzy" he says. Yeah...if that's what you want to call it. I am surprising him next weekend with two nights of hubby/wifey date time. He needs to GET OUT and get his mind off of training classes and "numbers"...he's ALWAYS talking about d@#$ numbers! He does a great job, but he's an even better husband and Daddy when he has the energy left over. I am very proud of my husband, but I want him to RELAX.
Next, Carly. TWELVE. Today she came home from school and tells me that her and her friend are making plans to go see "The Lovely Bones" this weekend. Casually I ask her what this movie is rated. Her reply: "PG-13. And I am 12, so...yano....". Very rarely does Carly give me attitude but she did there! Instantly I hopped on the internet to study up on how many stars for family friendliness "The Lovely Bones" received.....2/5. GREAT. So Trey and I talked and talked, watched the preview, talked with Carly, and finally decided that since this friends Mother would be attending with them that she could go. Afterward we were kicking ourselves. We can't go back on our answer, but I think that WE ARE SO UNPREPARED TO RAISE A TEENAGER! Someone help us...please. Carly is a good girl, but we should have had the parental confidence to give her a big NO on this request. But then again...she would have seen the flick regardless, all she has to do is wait until next weekend when surely her Mother would have gladly taken her. UGH. Today's challenge aside, Carly continues to be a straight A student and a great little person. Her heart and soul are so sweet. Watching her enter into her junior high years has really made Trey and I nervous. I think we are also feeling inspired to begin a family Bible study at the end of each day just like the Duggars do. Note to self: research family group studies online.
Conner: Ah, Conner man! What a cool kid. Conner is in the second half of 1st grade. He's had such a great year. His teacher....LOVE HER. We are currently planning a laser tag party for his 7th birthday which is a short 3 weeks away! This birthday means that I have been in Conner's life for over half of it! He still doesn't believe me when I tell him he was only 3 years old when Daddy and I started dating. He feels like my own....;)
Joey.....MY TERRIBLE TWO. I hate seeing him this way...kicking, screaming, arguing every little thing I say to him. I have been spending a LOT of time with John Rosemond (well, his books that is...) reading about this crucial time period where Joey is realizing that the world does not revolve around him. It's tough. At his core, Joey is a lover. I still get little glimpses of who Joey was up until this past week....I miss my sweet boy, but I know he will be back.
Ailey: SO SWEET. Ailey is the easiest baby. She constantly inspires me to reproduce. I am not done, so for those of you who were wondering....so long as God wills it, we will see another baby Montgomery around this house. Ailey sleeps all night, smiles constantly, and it is easy to figure out what she needs when she actually does cry. She loves her older siblings and is a MOMMY'S GIRL. I planned it that way. :) Additionally, she IS OFF THE CHARTS FOR WEIGHT AND LENGTH. We affectionately call her our "chunk of love".
As for me, Mommy and Wifey, I am hanging in there. This past week was REALLY challenging. I am working on myself a lot...trying to speak softly always, trying to run less on emotion and more on reason, trying to put my marriage ahead of my children....being challenged by it all. I have also been very busy getting our house ready for the market. We are Tega Cay bound. I can't wait to raise my sweet family at the lake surrounded by trees, parks, and the best schools in the state.
Well, that's a quick UP TO DATE UPDATE on the Montgomerys! Loving one another, loving life, loving telling YOU all about it! ta ta!

oh boy....The "I AM SO DONE!" Feeling...

Oh dear blog...it has been a while!

So, as of today Ailey is 2 months old! As most parents will say, it does feel like she's always been a part of our family. She is an amazing addition!

They say, "your children are a reflection of you". I have to say it's very true that Joey's personality very much reflects how I was as a new Mommy with him. He's a bit OCD, very much a perfectionist, extremely social, and has a touch of anxiety in everything he does...very "type A". With Ailey, I have been so peaceful. I have never once found myself in a bought of anxiety and frustration with a screaming newborn baby. She is so good! She goes with the flow, loves to cuddle, and just has the sweetest soul. You can see in her eyes that she is gentle and that she loves me. The experience of baby #2 has most definitely been different...and wonderful....and not "better" than my first (because NOTHING tops the birth of your first!), but definitely wonderfully different.

I love being a Mommy. I love having babies. I am addicted to it. It's my LIFE and I wouldn't trade it for the world! Joey is such a joy (when he's not having a typical "terrible two" meltdown) and every day he amazes me with something new. He talks non-stop, is so smart, and wow am I EVER BRAGGING! Getting to the point, as in awe as I am with Joey and with as easy and wonderful as the experience has been with Ailey, it definitely doesn't do anything to make me "feel done".

Oh how quickly the memories of constant nausea, vomiting, and NATURAL LABOR fade away. Oh sweet oxytocin! You are so perfect at erasing all the struggle and shining light on only the simply indescribable feelings of having a baby! Yes, it is all worth it!

Trey's words: "I knew I should have videotapped it all last time!" (HA!) I would have made excuses calling my former pregnant self "such a drama queen" and insisting that it "wasn't that bad". In my heart of hearts I know that it was "that bad", but I don't care. I want another baby!

Will I get one? I don't know the answer to that. But let me say this, reader; If you are questioning whether or not to take the baby route, whether or not you can handle it, if it is or is not worth it....I assure you, there is nothing in this life as wonderful as bringing another being into the world and experiencing the LOVE and happiness that being will bring to your marriage, family, extended family, friends, etc.

To me, my children are everything:)